Uniting to confront Blended Families in the Philippines

Uniting to Confront Blended Family Challenges in the Philippines Today

Blended families are created when single parents remarry and take along their individual set of families to live together. These families are typically composed of the couple and their kids from their previous marriages or relationships, and the children of their union. The complexities brought about by the setup give rise to blended family challenges and issues that commonly beset the members.

I have been gone for almost 11 years and I have seen the big impact in our society when families separate ways and would later join another set of family. It used to be that the second family are usually discovered when one of the common parents die and during the wake or the burial, someone will just suddenly be introduced as part of the family.

Some common challenges that blended families face include:

• Discipline

• Conflict of schedule

• Space issue

• Delegation of household chores

• Forms of entertainment

Nevertheless, one of the hardest challenges may involve handling the blended family’s finances.

Financial Challenges of a Blended Family

Money issues can pose as one of the more complex blended family challenges. Any financial setup can potentially cause friction. Whether the parents decide to combine their monetary resources or keep separate accounts, there will always be issues. For example, if money is combined, there can be questions about how money is spent. On the other hand, if both parents take charge of their own money, the lesser-earning parent may feel incapable of giving the same treats to his children who may feel envious towards their step brothers and sisters getting better treats from their higher-earning parent.

Nevertheless, through proper financial planning, parents in a blended family (seeing as how they are usually the primary breadwinner) could reap one of the best blessings of pooling the income together – financial stability.

Just think. Children of single parents used to live with limited financial resources. With only a parent earning for the family, children often struggle to survive with what little finances can provide them. Once their parents remarry, the family income is at least doubled, if not increased to sufficiently afford them better education and a higher standard of living. This results to a decrease in the stress formerly caused by financial constraints, thereby creating a happier home for two combined families.

So how can a blended family turn financial challenge into financial stability? Following are some tips to consider.

Discuss the option of having a prenuptial agreement

Before entering the union, you and your spouse-to-be should discuss the option of a prenup. Having a prenup is not an indication of distrust, and that should be made clear early on. A prenup can be a good way to have your finances sorted out in anticipation of your blended union’s outcome. Moreover, if either one of you have children from the previous marriage, having a prenup can preserve any investment or family business for the children’s future use.

Keep personal accounts separate from conjugal assets

It would be a good idea to be clear about this from the get-go. Inform your partner of your plan to keep everything you earned prior to your marriage separate from your joint savings. There’s nothing wrong with having separate personal accounts as long as you do not keep each other in the dark about it. Draw a line between assets you had before the marriage and assets you will accrue after you have tied the knot.

Keep lines of communication open regarding financial goals and spending habits

The last thing you want is to be caught off guard financially. Does each of you have outstanding debts? Discuss it so you’ll know what could be done about it. In this case, item number two would play an important role. It would be wise to lay out your financial priorities on the table early on so you both know whether you’re on the same page. More importantly, keep track of the inflow and outflow of money. It would also be a good idea to inform your spouse-to-be of financial responsibilities you still have involving the previous marriage (alimony and child support).

Create a budget together

After discussing your assets and liabilities and getting on the same page as far as financial priorities is concerned, it’s time to create a budget together. Be clear on who would be paying every day bills and who would handle mortgage payments, insurance premiums, car payments, etc. More often than not, such would be the responsibility of the higher-earning parent. Consult with each other in order to avoid problems when it comes to delegating financial responsibilities.

Organize your estate plan and review your will

Regardless if you keep some assets separate, it would be a good idea to document everything you and your partner have. Note down each asset’s values at the time of marriage. That may come in handy when estate planning or when drawing up your will. Make sure beneficiaries are updated, and make everyone you intend to leave a little something for (children, stepchildren, new spouse) is included in your will. Inform your lawyer of your plans so he can advise you accordingly.

Remarrying someone with children comes with the fervent hope that the new relationship and marriage be easy. Realistically, it can’t be easy. For couples who chose to remarry, the union seems more challenging because they are merging two sets of family into one. Both have different dynamics. However, with dedication, perseverance, planning, and taking on the individual role with dignity, all the benefits that a blended family promises can be reaped in no time at all.

For more information on how you can create a customized financial planning for blended families here in the Philippines, please register here.

http://www.investorsgroup.com/en/2306.aspx

http://www.kiplinger.com/article/saving/T023-C000-S002-blended-family-finances.html#

http://www.newyorklife.com/learn-and-plan/financial-tips-second-marriages-blended-families

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